April 28, 2006

Only The Finest Fore Our Clients

Posted in Keeping Up With The Cients at 6:55 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

My father loves golf and for as long as I can remember, has tried to make my sister, brother and I love it too.  Every year I vow that this is the year I will learn to love it; and every year, by hole seven or eight, I give up and spend the rest of the morning driving the cart and making educated guesses as to where my brother's ball landed.

So, last year when my boss asked me to be a beverage bitch for our firm's golf outing, I thought I had discovered the perfect solution.   Beverage bitch was everything I loved about the sport with none of the things I didn't, for instance, pretending to understand what my father means when he says things like "open up your club face a bit, kid."

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April 20, 2006

Excuse Me, but You Have a Bit of Baklava on Your Nose

Posted in Office Hijinks at 8:20 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

My friend L. and I run along Kelly Drive in the mornings. We do this to keep ourselves healthy and relieve stress, but mostly to check out other runners. While running, L. and I will swap stories about what is annoying us most.  For me it's mostly family and boys I am seeing; for L. it's neighbors, co-workers and of course boys she is seeing.   

So as we started off past boathouse row one morning, L. started venting about a third-year in her office.  It seems the other day L.’s boss was having a bad day; a really bad day.  The kind of really bad day that ends with a young associate getting fired.  L., who keeps a box of greeting cards at her desk and hates to see young associates wrongfully terminated, decided she would give her boss a card; a simple,  "Hey hope today is better than yesterday" sort of jobby, no big deal.  She signed everyone in her group's name, licked the envelope and was about to seal it when in hopped the bright-eyed, bushy tailed third-year.

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April 11, 2006

Hey batter, batter, batter.

Posted in Keeping Up With The Cients at 8:51 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

Every spring we are forced to play several softball games with one of our clients. Maybe forced is a bit harsh, some of the attorneys enjoy it; unfortunately not enough to field a team. So, one spring afternoon an associate approached me about playing that evening. It would seem they were short players and hoping to get more girls involved. I would like to hope I was asked because it was convenient for me to run home and change, or because the powers that be knew I didn’t have kids and a husband and therefore responsibilities that called me home.

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Mr. Backside

Posted in Happy Hour at 8:49 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

There we are, at happy hour, sipping cocktails, looking cute, waiting for the cute boys to approach us when out of the corner of my eye, I spot him – the hottest backside in the office, as I had affectionately come to call an attorney that use to work at our office. 

I grabbed my friend’s arm, “do you remember me talking about hottest backside in the office?”  See, I wasn’t kidding; I really did refer to him as that. 

“Yeah,’ my friend slowly responded and turned to follow my gaze. “He’s here.” 

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ERA Now — If Sally Fields Had Done It, It Would Have Worked

Posted in Office Hijinks at 8:40 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

In high school, I wanted to go to a Red Hot Chili Pepper’s concert. Unfortunately the concert was the night before the AP English exam and so my parents emphatically put the kibosh on that plan. While in hindsight I see their point, at the time I was a 17 year old brat who couldn’t understand how my parent’s could deny me this opportunity to see Anthony, Dave, Flea and Chad. They were hateful awful people and to show them how disappointed in them I was, I went to my father’s stereo system, put in my Pearl Jam VS CD, pressed the “up” button until it got to “Daughter” put that song on repeat and turned up the volume all the way. I then went up to my room and waited for my father to come home from work, hear the song and have what seemed to me to be a natural understanding of the severity of his actions and change his mind about letting me go to the concert.

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April 6, 2006

Hello world!

Posted in Uncategorized at 2:28 pm by devilwearsbrooksbrothers

So, you can’t get enough of my sordid, twisted tales of life at a law firm. Well, welcome.